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New favourite joke:

juliuscaesarofficial:

agathaheterodyne:

where-am-i-send-help:

ougbad:

karlimeaghan:

A Roman walks into a bar, holds up two fingers, and says ”Five beers, please.”

i dont get it

No one explain it

After the Roman drinks the beers, he tells the bartender, “I want a martinus.”

"Don’t you mean a martini?”

"If I wanted two, I would’ve asked for them."

these are the best jokes ever

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Ƭᴜʀɪᴀɴs ᴀʀᴇ ᴡɪʟʟɪɴɢ ᴛᴏ ᴅᴏ ᴡʜᴀᴛ ɴᴇᴇᴅs ᴛᴏ ʙᴇ ᴅᴏɴᴇ﹐ ᴀɴᴅ ᴛʜᴇʏ ᴀʟᴡᴀʏs ғᴏʟʟᴏᴡ ᴛʜʀᴏᴜɢʜ. insp
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petyrbaelishs:

Sansa had favored her mother’s gods over her father’s. She loved the statues, the pictures in leaded glass, the fragrance of burning incense, the septons with their robes and crystals, the magical play of the rainbows over altars inlaid with mother-of-pearl and onyx and lapis lazuli. Yet she could not deny that the godswood had a certain power too. Especially by night. Help me, she prayed, send me a friend, a true knight to champion me…

Sansa Stark Meme

     ↳ Nine Quotes [ 3/9 ]

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There is a reason that most fanfiction authors, specifically girls, start with a Mary Sue. It’s because girls are taught that they are never enough. You can’t be too loud, too quiet, too smart, too stupid. You can’t ask too many questions or know too many answers. No one is flocking to you for advice. Then something wonderful happens. The girl who was told she’s stupid finds out that she can be a better wizard than Albus Dumbledore. And that is something very important. Terrible at sports? You’re a warrior who does backflips and Legolas thinks you’re THE BEST. No friends? You get a standing ovation from Han Solo and the entire Rebel Alliance when you crash-land safely on Hoth after blowing up the Super Double Death Star. It’s all about you. Everyone in your favorite universe is TOTALLY ALL ABOUT YOU.

I started writing fanfiction the way most girls did, by re-inventing themselves.

Mary Sues exist because children who are told they’re nothing want to be everything.
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Zoom
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weissidian:

I made a cute as heck Pumpkaboo pattern available on several products up on my Society6! Happy October friends, stay tuned for more ghost pokemon designs ;-)

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sirenknights:

Dice Shaming

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I just gotta do something. 
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Zoom gangrell:

▼ Downfall of a Devil ▼ - A post-defeat Gangrel mix.

o1. Rusted From the Rain - Billy Talent // o2. Hopeless - Breaking Benjamin // o3. Meant to Live - Switchfoot // o4. The Dead Can’t Testify - Billy Talent // o5. What I’ve Done - Linkin Park // o6. A Beautiful Lie - 30 Seconds to Mars // o7. Who I Am Hates Who I’ve Been - Relient K // o8. Nothing Left to Say - Imagine Dragons // o9. Dust Bowl Dance - Mumford and Sons // 1o. Sahara - Relient K // 11. Vindicated - Dashboard Confessional

▼ listen here ▼ || ▼ img credit ▼

gangrell:

▼ Downfall of a Devil ▼ - A post-defeat Gangrel mix.

o1. Rusted From the Rain - Billy Talent // o2. Hopeless - Breaking Benjamin // o3. Meant to Live - Switchfoot // o4. The Dead Can’t Testify - Billy Talent // o5. What I’ve Done - Linkin Park // o6. A Beautiful Lie - 30 Seconds to Mars // o7. Who I Am Hates Who I’ve Been - Relient K // o8. Nothing Left to Say - Imagine Dragons // o9. Dust Bowl Dance - Mumford and Sons // 1o. Sahara - Relient K // 11. Vindicated - Dashboard Confessional

▼ listen here ▼ || img credit 

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smokingbomber:

aph-satan:

randomfandomteacher:

heretical-hypothetical:

artigosaurus:

queen-of-dork:

i-am-a-cat-eins-zwei-drei:

debisanacronym1:

WHY ARE NONE OF YOU FUCKERS FLIPPING SHIT?!?

NASA HAS DECLARED PLUTO A PLANET AGAIN

IT HAS MOONS!!!!! IT HAS MOONS!!!!!!!

WHAT. WHAT! PLUTO YOU FUCKING DID IT!

VIVA LA PLUTO, YOU DID IT!!!

THE UNDERDOG

I can’t find a source. Does anyone have any? I won’t believe it until I get a source.

http://time.com/3429938/pluto-planet-vote/

image

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surethattotallyhappened:

nextyearsgirl:

“Agree to disagree” is white guy speak for “I understand you have an opinion but unfortunately, me.”

No it’s human being speak for “We have differing opinions and I can see that neither of us are going to persuade the other to change theirs so we shouldn’t continue this argument because it’s going nowhere” jesus you’re all fucking children

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asifitwereachoice:

The love story in Holes is so underrated.

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